Hail Thee!!! Hail The Rains!!!

As the sun was beating down on me, walking at 12 in the noon was turning out to a nightmare for me. My idea of taking a healthy stroll towards the metro station was a total failure. Wearing a brand new pair of shorts, (that I recently acquired from janpath) and a light Tee, headphones plugged in my ears, I sauntered out of my house with high hopes of making it to the station in simple 5 minutes. As my steps continued further, my agony of walking under the steam began increasing at rapid levels. At first, I was confident, (at least tried to be) but then it became way too much… my resistance levels gave away… “Ahoy! Chalo bhai Metro tak pahuncha do”, I hailed a rickshaw with a huffing and puffing voice. At that very moment, my feet began burning very badly. Indication. It occurred to me that God must be blabbering to himself, “Go Swati, display your bravery skills once more! I am proud that you at least challenged my Sunny Mates of heaven”

Reaching the metro station was such a relief… The cool A/C wind blowing inside literally took my breath away… Sheer bliss… pure paradise…I wish I would come down to the metro station everyday, every time… I won’t mind even if I have to strike a date here… Okay! I agree that was exaggeration. Period.

Boarded the metro in another two minutes and arrived at my destination in less than 10 minutes. What a boon this metro is to poor hapless creatures like me!!! The moment I stepped outside the metro station, of course after finishing all the formalities, the sun slapped me right in the face! The heat was on… or rather was back yet again… Like a camel with a parched throat I moved out. But this time, I did not show off any of my valor-embellished skills but straightaway took a rickshaw towards the Arts Faculty. All this pain, adventure in the sun, roaming in the UV rays… simply to meet my partner-in-crime, Divyanshi baby!!! Lol!!!

Thankfully, the moment I reached Arts faculty, she was waiting there for me! The rush there was humongous, thanks to the admission process going on in DU! Young aspirants scampering for forms, counseling and what not! We thought, the best way to beat the heat, have a glass of fresh juice. The Lord Almighty had different plans for us… The Juice turned out be a total dampener… bad taste, hardly chilled and on top of it one big huge glass as compared to the regular one which is normally available… It took us ages to finish it! We did not drink it but simply gulped it down our throats… after all it costed bloody 40 bucks…!!

Stepped out Arts Faculty… moved towards a shadier place to rest out asses. Drip Drop… Trip Trop… water fell on my knees…okay…maybe an avian creature was too happy to spot me in the sun…but the drops kept trickling down… and wonder what.. It was raining… It was raining… I couldn’t believe my eyes…I couldn’t believe my stars… So God certainly had better plans for me today!

I stepped out of my home in the beating heat and this God’s present for my morning bravery. I love you God! Hail Thee!!! Hail the Rains!!!

Ps- Chandan thanks for the pic.. :P

THE GREAT INDIAN FALL

The splashing of water, the trickling of drops, the bubbles galore and the great Indian fall... well this is not an exhibition of my poetry traits or some faintly somber attempt of awry rhyming at one stretch... it is also not the weird explanation of some all the more weird advertisements that are doing its regular rounds in the idiot box nowadays or the radio stations. Neither is it the urge of a lesser-known mortal to gain attention of some well-known folks nor is it written just for the sake of putting up some damn written stuff on my blog in a harried manner.

My dear fellow men and fellow women, (empowerment of women is a deadly thing...can drag you in to a whole lot of unnecessary controversies...better to be on a safe side and mention the women community wherever possible...all you feminists out there, hope you are feeling satisfied to your heart’s content now!!!) I am merely struggling hard to put my ‘painful’ and ‘slippery’ outburst in black and white to provide some sort of relief to my freakish limb. The incident took place exactly an year ago... and my infatuation with water or rains reached to its extreme height and in fact did prove fatal to my survival in this big bad world.

At the same time let me warn you guys, I am not an individual who has lost her sanity levels... I am perfectly in control of my life and my emotions but the incident that I am going to narrate in a few lines from here on is an incident that would drive any normal human being crazy. Please bear with me and pardon me for usage of any nasty comments and words in between.

13 JULY, 2007...It was that fateful morning... to be precise fifteen minutes past 7...the birds had already started chirping with all their strength... the pressure cooker in the kitchen was screeching loudly spilling the compressed water vapor in all directions... the sky was gurgling, roaring and bulging with thick black clouds waiting impatiently for initiating another round of pre-monsoon downpour. Standing in the balcony with a cup of steaming hot coffee in my right hand and my new FLY cell phone in the other, I was busy writing a message to anukampa not realising that tiny droplets of water had begun to drip from the Lord Almighty’s heavenly abode... “Hey dude! Lovely morning for a perfect shoot. Hope everything goes off well today... Ce ya at CP metro at 10!” the message read... Slowly moving inside my room to take shelter from the drizzling blessings of God, I dashed off the Sms to her... Cool wind lashing my face, a sense of satisfaction, I could smell adventure lurking at the start of that day... What a day it will be, I thought... Imagining the scenic beauty of Delhi’s archaic monuments, picturizing my whole group walking and jostling among the capital’s population, clicking photos with our cell phone cameras, trying hard to achieve that perfect angle... Mervyn, Supriya, Anukampa, Pragya, Juhi, Vaibhav, Nikhita, Yuvika, Sahil... waooo giving our best to capture the whole of our prestigious city, our pride, our honour, our pristine glory- our Delhi... SADDI DILLI!!! Hmmm..... got so engrossed in all these thoughts or should I say after building innumerable castles in the air... every wee bit in the picture had changed.... the birds had stopped chirping, the downpour was no longer visible, the pressure cooker had halted its whistling, the cool wind had disappeared in thin air and it was half past 7 now!!!

I hurriedly barged in to the bathroom snatching the towel from the cupboard... Hastily turned on the shower... and searched for that idiotic soap which was hiding behind the flush instead of the soap case... God knows who the F***ing hell kept it there... the water from the shower was dripping lazily, doing all kinds of catwalk it can ever do... Oh! My Gosh! The foreign models walk at a much better speed on the ramp than my shower... frustrated to the core and afraid of reaching late... I quickly turned on the tap... Thankfully, here the speed of the precious natural resource was reasonably good.... Intending to take the mug lying at one end of the bathroom, I stretched my leg... doing a bit of circus mastery... my toe was aiming to get a hold of the mug’s handle... oh! You mug... it is too much...well after exactly 7 seconds of my juggler antics instead of gripping the mug handle... My toe refused to work anymore and just lost the balance taking me straight down to the floor and slipping away to glory... In my anger I had dropped the soap on the floor... the floor all wet and slimy... a paradise for skaters!!! WHAT A FALL!!! The fall of my lifetime... In my entire life of 18 years, I had never felt such pain and anguish after twisting my leg.... What a twisting experience I had? I shouted at the top of my voice... Well, what a pity? I had to twist my leg in a bathroom where no one can even come to my resuce...Even if anyone comes...Gosh!!! Better said the least, man!!!


I don’t remember and don’t even want to how I managed to get out of that dreadful bathroom... My dad was shocked to see me in that situation... all wet... all soggy... all drippy... and one big swollen leg!!! He freaked out more than me... buzzed the doctor... refused to hear anything and called anukampa himself and canceled the whole of the outing for me... even the doctor supported him... I was grounded for a week’s bed rest!!! And was immediately put on rigorous medication!!!

After all, it was the GREAT INDIAN FALL... jaisa fall waisi dekh bhaal!!!

WHY I LOVE RAINS? :D

Last Monday as I woke up all blurry eyed... I was welcomed with a strange dripping noise. As I was too busy rubbing my eyes and mulling over my last night’s dream, I failed to notice this extremely intriguing sound. Thanks to the buzzing abilities of my best friend, Divs,I mean Divyanshi who is a fantastic substitute for my morning alarm..lol.. I managed to wake up at least at 11. Minus the noise and the dreamy thoughts, I grabbed hold of my cell phone...saw three missed calls of her and suddenly it struck me... “Gosh! I am gonna be dead... 9 was the time”. I rolled my eyes towards that antique clock of mine and it was ticking away leisurely displaying proudly the time = 20 minutes past 11. The clock hanging atop the wall... was staring at me... as if mocking at me and saying... “I rang loudly at 9 to shrug you off your lethargy but you ignored me like anything and turned over the other side of the bed. You deserve waking up so late and missing everything. I am really happy and satisfied now..!!! HUH..!!!” grinning silently to itself...!!!

My nails started quivering... they were waiting to be bitten by me... as I always do when I am nervous... My feet began to shiver... they were waiting to be put to use... as I always do when I am late for my task and I run around helter skelter on the roads of Delhi trying to catch that crowded and stinky bus or scorning at the autowallahs and finally hopping on to either of my life lines.

I felt like killing myself ( What? You asking me whether I bought a dagger or not!!! OMG... I really do not wish to be suicidal... you see... lol..) At that very moment...like an icing on the cake... and to add to my woes... My Dad started “raining” his expert comments on the pros and cons of waking up early in the morning. He took me to an altogether different atmosphere with his talks of jogging, running and walking early morning with fresh air to breathe in and health tips doing the rounds. But it was not all that smooth sailing... the advices were followed by sudden scoldings... and sarcastic statements being thrown at me with the corner of his eyes.

I lay still in my bed like a corpse... afraid that one single movement would ruin everything... But my mind was wandering everywhere... Divs surely gonna be angry at me!! I was supposed to meet her at DU metro station at 9... and I was snoring away to glory with my rockstar floating gently in my dreams ... Oh yeah!! How can I forget that passionate kiss which I shred with him... ummm...It was fabulous... lol.. ahem.. ahem... I mean I need to do some serious thinking about my life... I am such a laziness personified person... I would land myself in trouble one day for these stupid acts of mine... Reaching late everytime... everywhere... I need to change... I have to do something...

By that time, Dad had finished his commentary... with great grit and determination, I stood up from my cozy little warm bed (Aww.. how much I love you sweetheart...lol.. !!!) and I swiped the curtains open and guess what I saw or should I say.. what I heard.

That strange noise made its way through my entire room... buzzed in the whole of my house and brought a huge smile on my face...

IT WAS RAINING CATS AND DOGS.... The weird noise was none other than the dripping rainfall near my window sill... and the picturesque outside was simply worth watching. The green shades of nature, people running for shelter everywhere, the clogged drains which definitely put the MCD to shame, the tiny tots from the slums making the best of these rains and taking a bath after so many months... hmm.. water conservation indeed.. The roaring, thundering black clouds waking up all the lazy people of the earth, including me..lol..!!!

Tring..Tring..Tring..Tring... My phone began to ring.... a message had been received. With a hush... everything came back to me... my shaking fingers slowly punched the keys of my Nokia Cell phone and here came the catch... “Hey Swati, really sorry girl... I just called up to say that it seems impossible for us to meet. So you can sleep well... damn these rains man... I will call you back in the evening. Sorry to disturb you...take care.. sleep tight...!!!”

Man... you still asking me... WHY I LOVE THE RAINS????

MAY RAINS... :)

Dip, dip, dip... drop, drop, drop... Tip, tip, tip... tap, tap, tap... Rains splashing all over, water making its presence felt at every creature on this earth and last but not the least, the capital of the country drenched in absolute rainfall with traffic jams ruling the roost. Wondering what you are reading about? Well, an entrance in the reporting arena... a day which I was eagerly looking forward to with bated breath... a discussion which was (though) a tried and tested issue but still hasn’t totally lost its relevance... 22nd May... this day will remain etched in my memory for a long time to come, not only because it marked my debut in the television world but it was partially spoilt by the unpredictable May Rains.

May Rains... an unheard phenomena which has affected each and every tiny living being here and it was left me somewhat distraught too. Waking up at around 5.30 in the morning is certainly a Herculean task for me. Moreover, taking a bath, getting dressed and to top it all, hear all kinds of naggings from my dad to finish off my half eaten breakfast... It is definitely not a pleasant experience early in the morning. Drawing the curtains, when I looked outside the shady netted windows of my room... the picture looked gruesome and dull. Thundering clouds, crackling noises, wind gathering up to hit a big storm and damp roads... Rains are good unless and until you are all tucked in your bed, with a hot cup of coffee and a big plate of sumptuous pakodas. But driving in the rains, with all kinds of traffic jams waiting to welcome you with open arms... hmmm... not a good deal at all, at any cost.

After much pondering, fuming and fretting, I finally took the plunge, I mean stepped out of my place of safe haven at 7.30 sharp. With my brother at the wheels, I thought of listening to some soothing music to relax my nerves and let my mind wander in some unknown world, away from all the maddening things of MAY RAINS. The drive for first 5-6 kms was pretty smooth... no traffic jams... simple two minutes stoppage times. My positivism reached its height... but, alas at that very moment, it came crashing down when my car stopped at NARIANA intersection for nearly 60 minutes (yeah! You got it right man...Exactly an hours and 1 second). I waited, waited, waited and waited for the car to move forward... prayers, chants, pleas and appeals to the Almighty... it was all happening in the tiny white ZEN... people stared at me wide eyed... as if I was some unknown green vicious monster appealing to God to accept my prayers... preparing my sacrifice and chanting n mumbling under my breath some god-damn verses... They were wondering, that why on earth was I talking and mumbling to my self... probably they were endeavoring to do a course in lip reading... or should I say, interfering and poking their nose in others personal affairs... hmmm... seems so typical of Delhities... (Delhi bashing goes on everywhere)

However, unaware and oblivious of all these disastrous developments happening around me, I continued my sacred service to God. As they, true prayers never go unanswered, the old rugged car began to drag its wheels, energy being fuelled in my Big Bro... pushing the accelerator with an enormous strength.....at a snail’s pace the care moved in the beginning but then at a ferocious speed... my bro put all his efforts in driving as fast as possible. The miniature Delhi roads were virtually transformed into Formula One racing tracks and by 30 minutes I finally managed to arrive at my destination.

Amidst all the water, mud and traffic... I stepped inside the posh Hyatt Regency hotel like a battered and bruised warrior with a never say die attitude, holding aloft my spirits and wearing my enigmatic smile to cover the event.

CHEERS...!!!